Back Where They Belong

Season 7 of Project Runway premiered last week and I could just SQUEAL nonstop about the champagne toast on the Atlas rooftop against the backdrop of Manhattan.

"Reunited and it feels soooo good!"

Yep. I went there.

Last season in LA was just SO wrong. I'm sorry, I know LA likes to fancy itself a fashion hot spot... But no. Just no. It doesn't count. They had to pile the contestants into a giant van just to get to Mood for their fabrics, and Tim Gunn has mentioned that it could take up to an hour each way. WTF? Talk about wasting time! Just the fact that Tim Gunn is bad mouthing the season in his own, very proper, very reserved, and undeniably polite way is a bad sign.

Stay out of LA, Heidi! I'm talkin' to you! I hear you're planning to head back there for next season and if you do? I'm really going to have to boycott. (Okay, I'll probably watch, anyway. But, I'm not going to like it!)

No worries. They are back in the fashion district, back at the Parson's work room, and most importantly - our beloved Michael Kors and Nina Garcia are back to sigh, make faces at the contestants, and offer their witty commentary and catty criticisms. All is right with the world.

Actually, there is one thing wrong with the world... So far? I'm super unimpressed with the latest crop of designers.

Amy Sarabi - Why is there an extra cup thing on one of her boobs? I might have liked this if it weren't for that bizarre detail. I kinda like the floaty fabric and the diamond print. I just don't understand the boob thing. At all.

Anna Lynett - This isn't bad, actually... I think it's kind of just safe and sweet. A great dress to keep yourself right in the middle of the pack.

Anthony Williams - I have NO idea where he was going with this. That thing on the side is just... The most bizarre thing ever. One of the judges even mentioned that you could probably smuggle out a bottle of champagne in it and dude... It's totally true! And what is with the tacky as hell flowered fabric choice? Not acceptable.

Maya Luz - this just screams mini-wannabe-Christian-Siriano to me. That thing exploding from her shoulder and chest just doesn't do it for me. Not at all.

Mila Hermanovsky - The print on the inside of the jacket is interesting, and I like how she paired it with a different print on the shirt. I'm not crazy about the skirt, but I think the whole look works together. Nothing special, though.

Pamela Ptak - WTF is this? I like the color, but that's it. I don't like the sleeves, I don't like the length, I don't like the deep-V... I really don't like any of it. Better luck next time, Pam.

Jesse Lenoir - Uhm... Is this a power suit that's completely inappropriate for the office? I hate the fabric. HATE IT. The off-the-shoulder thing is actually pretty cute, but not in that fabric. Not a bad concept, but I just don't get the execution.

Jesus Estrada - It's a chocolate-colored evening gown. With a sheer train in the back. And a bottom half that was literally tacked on as an afterthought. Ugly, tacky, stuck in the 80's. That's pretty much all I can say.

Jonathan Peters - Eh. I'm bored. And I really dislike the way the fabric is shorter in the front. What happens if there's a breeze or something? Just seems like an accident waiting to happen.

Ping Wu - Uhm... Really? Really?? It's a bunch of mismatched fabric draped on a beanpole and wrapped around her head. I don't get it and I don't want to get it. It's just ugly. There's no two ways around it. It's just really freaking ugly.

Seth Aaron Henderson (who looks suspiciously like Keith Richards, no?) - I could be wrong, but I'm pretty sure I've seen this dress at Hot Topic. It just seems like something Avril Lavigne might wear in a music video. I was not impressed and I can't figure out why the judges were practically salivating over it.

Jeneane Marie Ceccante - Yawn. I like the semi-sheer top. The skirt is perfectly acceptable. I'm just bored by it.

Jay Nicholas Sario - This could've been a cute little dress... Except for the fact that there are three pom-poms attached to the most inappropriate places possible. Couldn't he have used the extra fabric to, I don't know... Make the damn skirt longer??

Ben Chmura - I can't even explain how much I hate this dress. Seriously. I hate it a lot. My hatred knows no bounds. Why, why, WHY do we need pointy sleeves? The fabric is atrocious and the construction is seriously questionable. Awful on all accounts. Boooooooo.

Christiane King - LOSER! And I think it's pretty obvious why. This dress reminds me way too much of Qristyl Frazier's awful design from last season. Where on Earth would you ever pick those two fabrics to go together? And the whole design just kind of makes it look like she ran out of fabric. Ugh. All around ugly.

Emilio Sosa - WINNER! I'm not in love with this dress, but it's clearly one of the best. The construction was impeccable and it moved really well on the runway. The only thing that throws me is the pattern, it just reminds me of bottle caps for some reason. Other than that, it was a pretty cute dress.

So, that's it. The slightly anti-climactic premiere of Project Runway Season 7.

Congratulations, Emilio! Auf weidersehen, Christiane!

Good luck to the rest of the designers!

[photo credits: mylifetime.com]